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Flim Flam has cleared out his junk shed (and in the process evicted Old Joe) to bring you these fabulous never to be repeated once in a lifetime deals:

An authentic Whiskerino beard	Transelvation crucifix
Made from only the finest horse hair, this full length Ziff makes the perfect gift for the modern Gentleman, or Lady. Available in a range of colours. One size fits all.	Lovingly hand crafted from local timber this cross wards off vampires and fits neatly in any over-sized pocket. Now with free string.	Old Hag not included.

Whiskerino trophee	Whiskerino potion
Genuine double reinforced cardboard replica of the trophee traditionally awarded to the Whiskerino contest winner. Numbered collector's edition.	Dr J's original potion. Said to enhance one's beard. Colour, consistancy and effects may vary.

Miniature sugar tongs	Egyptian map
These delicate sugar tongs are rococo in style. Also available in large.	Reproduced in hard wearing goat hide this quality item now includes smudge guard.